


Don't You Know Who I Am?

by Ylevihs



Series: My Name's Not Matt [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Consensual, Humor, Kylo thinks it's weird role play, M/M, Non-Penetrative Sex, Slight Kylux, handjobs, not really because Hux really believes it's Matt, they're both idiots is the point
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 12:55:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5786050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ylevihs/pseuds/Ylevihs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>General Hux and Matt the Radar Technician end up having casual sex because Kylo doesn't realize that Hux hasn't realized who he is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't You Know Who I Am?

**Author's Note:**

> The SNL skit was too much. I hadn't written fanfiction in a solid four years and then the SNL skit with Matt the Radar Technician ended that peace.

It was the third complaint to hesitantly slide into Hux’s field of vision that let him know the engineering supervisor had not been exaggerating. For some unknown reason a new employee had been brought onto the base and while no one could place where he had come from, there was general agreement that he was the worst radar technician anyone had ever seen. It was becoming problematic. More work hours were being put into repairing the repairs this ‘Matt’ person was failing than was acceptable.

A quick conference with the officer in charge of Matt’s department only added to Hux’s concern. This new technician had obvious problems with authority, lacked any apparent experience or references and was taking up valuable time and resources. Yet when Hux had questioned why this obvious idiot hadn’t been removed from the premises the supervisor had gone quiet. His eyes had taken on a shade of fear and had asked, haltingly, as if terrified someone might overhear, if Hux had met the man yet. 

It was rare that General Hux interacted on a personal basis with the people under his command. He wouldn’t have been able to name anyone on the radar repair staff if he’d been paid to do it. Hux was very, very good at delegating the sort of tasks that might require long periods of interpersonal communication. Nervous glances were cast in his direction and then immediately torn away. 

The supervisor had reported that the new technician was meant to be repairing a simple wiring malfunction in the hallway just outside the main command station. It was causing slight visual interference on the scanners and should have been fixed within twenty minutes at the most. This new technician, this ‘Matt’, had been sitting on his knees in front of the open panel for the past hour. Another technician loomed over him, arms crossed over her chest, foot tapping impatiently. 

“Come on Matt, this should have been taken care of forty minutes ago. I got places to be Matt,” she chided, sounding more bored than angry. Her eyes drifted, took in Hux pacing towards her, and then slammed shut tightly. She straightened, arms flying to her sides. 

“Constantly criticizing me is not going to make me go faster,” Matt growled under his breath. 

“General Hux, sir,” she said stiffly. Matt’s reaction was much more visible. His shoulders lurched to his ears and he dropped something loudly. 

“On your feet technician,” Hux ordered coolly. “Take over this,” he nodded to the technician and then the open panel where Matt was kneeling. 

“Yes sir,” she said nervously and immediately went to work. 

Matt the radar technician, Hux was surprised to see, was taller than him. He was also endeavoring to fold into himself to seem smaller and avoid eye contact.  
“Follow me,” Hux demanded and began walking at a brisk pace without pausing to see if Matt had obeyed the order. It never even crossed his mind that he wouldn’t. And yet. Matt seemed to be hesitating, glancing back at the open panel and then forward at Hux’s feet. “Is there a problem?” he asked in a tone that managed to convey that if Matt thought he had a problem now he had no idea what his future was about to hold. 

“No…sir,” he walked without looking where he was going, as if used to other people moving out of his way. He sent some of the tools scattered on the floor flying. “Uh…sorry,” he muttered thickly.

“Technician,” Hux barked, his little supply of patience having been almost fully depleted. Matt followed then, watching his feet. 

 

Hux waited until they were out of general earshot before rounding on the technician.  
“What is your designation number?” he asked sharply, studying Matt’s features. The face was long and pale, the hair looked bizarre and out of place. The glasses rested oddly on his face, as if he were unused to wearing them. It was some sort of disguise, Hux had been able to sniff that out almost immediately, and a shit one at that. It looked as if it had been thrown together with hope and double sided tape. It was insulting. 

Matt blinked owlishly. “Um…I’m Matt, I’m a radar technician,” he sounded as if he were trying to convince himself more than Hux. 

“Your employee number?”

“Um…,” Matt was now frantically looking around the room, eyes landing everywhere except on Hux’s face. It was not fear, though. Something else filled the dark eyes shielded by those ridiculous glasses. They were alone together and Hux was blocking the only exit to the small room. 

“What level is your security clearance?” Hux barked. 

“Listen, I…,” and now notes of anger were beginning to needle through in his voice.

“No,” Hux was shocked with how even his voice sounded considering that he was absolutely livid. “Where were you stationed before coming here? Who authorized your transfer? Who do you report to?” Hux left no time between each question and with each word he encroached further into Matt’s personal space. He knew his face would have started to grow red in his fury but he couldn’t be bothered to care at the moment. The fucking resistance. They had presumed to send a SPY into HIS BASE and thought this pathetic disguise was going to fool him for a second. He felt a peptic tide rise up his esophagus at the thought. 

Matt did not step away, allowing Hux to yell into his face without moving. 

“Kylo Ren,” Matt spat out as soon as there was a lull in the tirade. It sounded like it had been pulled from his mouth like a molar. 

“What?” Hux’s brain momentarily backfired. 

“K-kylo Ren…he’s the one who…um…he can vouch for me,” Matt met his eyes for the first time as if willing him to believe it. And Hux found himself…almost…it…it wasn’t that unbelievable. Was it? Hux was having trouble. The beautiful glow of anger that had been hazing over his head was dissipating leaving behind a muggy cloud. 

“Kylo Ren,” he repeated, still not grasping the concept. “Kylo Ren will vouch for you,” Hux felt like mouth was working against his brain. Matt nodded slowly, maintaining eye contact. And then Hux came back to himself like a slap in the face. “We’ll see about that, shall we?” he gripped Matt’s upper arm intent on dragging him to Ren’s quarters. Matt stuttered behind him. “He’s usually training this time of day,” and it almost sounded for a moment as if Matt had asked him how he knew that. 

“No…Kylo Ren, he…I…I’m not a technician!” Matt shouted, his chest heaving, pulling against the arm Hux had claimed. It was a distressingly strong grip for a man who had never seen real combat. Hux seethed at him silently, unsure of where to direct himself first. “I was just a…a…cafeteria worker,” Matt managed, “and Kylo Ren saw me and said that I had to go fix something he broke and then people started calling me a radar technician and…and,” Matt looked like he was on the edge of tears, jaw quivering, eyelids fluttering. “I didn’t know what to do, I tried to go back to cafeteria and then he saw me and started yelling,” he squeaked out. “I mean, he’s super scary, right? What was I gonna do? Say no? You don’t say no to Kylo Ren, man. People who say no to Kylo Ren die,” 

Hux stared hard at the other man and found himself believing him. Subordinates did not say no to Kylo Ren. And it certainly wasn’t out of character for Ren to demand absurd things. This ridiculous looking man had just been in the wrong place at the wrong time and was doing his best to not piss off the scary man with the lightsaber. It didn’t sound all that strange in his mind but something in the back of his brain was screaming at him. He silenced it. 

“Don’t take me to Kylo Ren, I have a friend who saw him without his shirt and he said he was ripped and have you seen his lightsaber? Its super badass, I bet he could take out anyone here, no problem,” Matt rambled the fear-laced praises of the Master of the Knights of Ren. 

And you’re just some panicky idiot with ill-fitting glasses, aren’t you? Hux thought in the quiet part of his mind. The stab of pity running through him was bizarre, but Hux could understand on some forgotten primal level that fear. The voice in his head was shrieking now. Hux had forgotten he was still clutching Matt’s upper arm until he felt the bicep flexing reflexively. Matt was slender under that jumpsuit but the muscle had strength to it. He released his grip and Matt took his arm back slowly. “I guess I’m in a lot of trouble aren’t I?” Matt asked, his wide mouth twitching to the side. It made him look significantly less stuck up than he had before. 

“Are you a quick learner?” Hux asked suddenly and Matt shrugged. “Find someone to train you, and do it quickly. I cannot afford to lose any more time or resources to your incompetence at this ‘job’. You have two days to get yourself together or…,” he let the quiet threat hang in the air, not really feeling his heart in it. Oddly proportioned, gangly Matt with his stupid blonde hair that didn’t fit the face and his bug eyed glasses hadn’t asked for any of this. He was just trying to get by and then Kylo Ren had come into his sad little life and ruined everything and now THE General Hux was yelling at him. Hux sympathized on a level he didn’t care admitting to. “Go. Get back to work,” Hux ordered, straightening his clothes and avoiding looking at Matt’s face. He focused instead on the two guards doing their paces in the hallway outside. As he went to step outside he felt as if a hand had grabbed his own. When he turned Matt hadn’t moved yet, but he was watching him. 

“Uh…General?...Thanks,” he said awkwardly. “Thank you,” 

“Make sure I don’t get any more complaints about you,” Hux replied, more formally than he perhaps meant to. 

 

Hux had two more complaints about Matt the radar technician before the day was out. A cluster headache was beginning to bloom behind his temples and Hux had to breathe out slowly to keep it from growing. He found Matt on a security camera, completely frozen as he was berated by another technician. Coils of wires lay at their feet next to an open floor panel, where a severed, live wire was flopping balefully. Pinching the bridge of his nose Hux sighed heavily. Even if his life depended on it he would never be able to answer WHY he felt compelled to help this idiot. But he did. It was some infuriating mix of pity and empathy. He was sure Ren had done more damage to his plans than he had ever helped them and on both a smaller and greater scale it seemed he had damaged this moron. Hux watched him on the screen, hoping the headache would diminish. 

Matt had knelt down and was now trying to reach around the live wire without electrocuting himself. He reached in once, twice, got shocked once, twice and then pulled his hand back, visibly cursing. Moron. He waved his hand around to get the feeling back into it and then dove back into the sparking fray. Hux found himself smiling. Ah. That’s what this was. 

Ever since Hux had first discovered that he had a penchant for men, back when he was in the academy, he had also discovered he had deplorable taste in men. He couldn’t help but like screw-ups. They were infuriating and idiotic and some rooted in part of him felt like he could make them better. Craft these morons into the men they could truly be, great and controlled and all because of him and it would be glorious and they would love him for it and…Hux let his forehead fall to his desk. Shit.  
He’d been able to handle Ren’s screws up. That had been easy. After the initial desire to find him bizarrely endearing and fix him had surfaced Hux had carefully repainted it frustration and renamed it hatred and had more or less forgotten about it. Granted, every once and while Ren would royally fuck up and Hux would indulge in his failure and that indulgence would turn to a fantasy where he found it endearing and...Hux raised his head and caught sight of Matt again. He’d somehow managed to wrangle the live wire and was holding it above his head like some sort of trophy as his other hand groped for a tool just out of reach. The other technician kicked it out of his reach and Hux could see Matt’s face twist with impotent rage. It was stupid. And hilarious.  
And.  
Shit. 

Hux called for Matt to be brought to his office the next morning. 

“I thought you said I had two days,” Matt said in a monotone, his face carefully blank. He sat on the low, stiff backed chair awkwardly. It had been designed to be slightly uneven, tilted at just the right angle for the occupant to be forced to stare up at Hux. The General had ordered it to be custom built and it was perfect. Matt adjusted his glasses on his face and looked around the room. Hux moved from behind his desk and leaned on it, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“I think we both know that I could give you two months and see the same results,” he said and suddenly felt Matt’s eyes on him. Little sparkles of anger shone in them.  
“What’s that supposed to mean? I’m working my ass off,” Matt’s voice began to rise slightly and Hux had to fight the grin rising to his face. What a useless idiot. It was adorable. Except that it wasn’t, his brain reminded him. It was compromising his ability to run an efficient base. In more ways than one. 

Hux had thought of him through the night. 

“I was thinking of a transfer. Get you out of Ren’s path so you don’t have to worry. Get you back in the cafeteria where you belong just…on a different base,” this clearly caught Matt off guard. 

“Oh…uh…yeah. That. That could work,” he obviously wasn’t thrilled with the idea. 

“What, you have something keeping you here?” Hux asked, his eyebrows arching. “What could someone like you possibly have to keep you here? Do you have someone you care about?” the thought was ridiculous and the strangled chuckle he let loose hung cruelly in the air. Matt looked genuinely startled by the question. Startled and…what was that? Offended? Probably; Hux had a tendency to insult the men he was attracted to born from years of trying to cultivate plausible deniability. 

“I mean. I guess the other technicians don’t really like me. But I thought I was making good progress with the cafeteria workers. Some of the Stormtroopers even remembered my name,” his tone was not as sad sounding as Hux imagined it should have been. It was more reflective; as if he were actually proud of that. It was mind-warpingly pathetic. “We had some good talk,” 

“Good talk?” Hux repeated. 

“Yeah,” even he didn’t sound convinced. “I mean. You’re the nicest person so far—talking with me, willing to stand up to Kylo Ren for me, and everything,”

“I never said--,” 

“That was really kind of you,”

It hit him. That’s what that tone was, Hux’s mouth twitched in a pitying smile: it was accusatory.  
“Something on your mind?” Hux asked, equally accusingly. Almost equally. The idea of this gangly idiot thinking he could verbally spar with him was adora…no. Stop that train of thought. Matt rose from the chair and Hux was reminded that the technician was taller than him. The distance between them was closed and Matt was standing very, very close and his dark eyes were very…no. Stop that train too. 

“You really aren’t afraid of Kylo Ren are you?” Matt’s voice was almost shaking. It could have been fear or anger but Hux’s mind wanted it to be something else. 

“I don’t imagine I’ll be in any great deal of danger by hiding a cafeteria worker from him,” Hux said dismissively. Would this idiot stop talking about Ren? It was distracting. Unwilling to allow Matt to have the upper ground Hux straightened himself. He would look so much better without the glasses—or the vest, or the jumpsuit or…hit the brakes, last stop, everybody off the damn train. 

“I think it would be foolish to hide anything from him,” Matt’s voice had changed. The texture of it in the air felt…well that was it wasn’t it? Hux could feel it in the air around them. Was it a threat? Or was Matt just projecting his fear of the saber-wielding mad man. The way Matt was standing had changed; he was no longer folded in on himself. There was a presence to him now. Well. That certainly had an appeal. Those thoughts had started up a rival train-service and were doing a fair business running through Hux’s mind. 

“What else would I need to hide from him?” 

“I don’t know, General. What else would you need to hide from Kylo Ren about us?” he didn’t sound like he was flirting. Did he? He was standing in Hux’s personal space and seemed to be taking up a lot of it and it felt weirdly like he baiting him to say something stupid and god it had been a long time since he had indulged in anything hadn’t it?  
“I might have an idea,” Hux replied carefully seeing if Matt would pick it up. Matt held his gaze steady. And then the idiot went and licked his lips. 

Hux twisted a hand into the collar of that hideous jumpsuit and pulled Matt into a kiss. The other man didn’t react immediately, but when he did, oh, he did. Hux clutched at Matt’s hips just as Matt began to gyrate against him. They kissed crudely, exhaling harshly through their noses so that they didn’t have to break contact. The part of Hux’s mind that had been yelling earlier was now shrieking like a siren. He told it to shut up. That he needed this. Deserved this. He had already scheduled the transfer for Matt so, really, who would give a shit? Not him and not Matt and certainly not Kylo-fucking-Ren. 

Hux tore the damn vest off at around the same time Matt made the decision to try and undo Hux’s pants. The jumpsuit was dealt with easily and Hux’s uniform pants didn’t pose much of a problem once he took over from Matt. Hux took a half of a second to examine the other man and yes. Yes. He did look better without the jumpsuit. Much better. Hux’s mind was overcome with the glasses the glasses get rid of the fucking glasses. They were dry humping like teenagers, Hux dimly realized, in the middle of his office. And he’d just thrown Matt’s stupid glasses, hadn’t he? And his shirt was open and both of them had their pants around their ankles. And Matt’s hand, oh god, Matt’s hand was firm and warm and perfect. Hux braced himself against his desk, thrusting into the contact and began nipping at Matt’s jaw, burying his hands into his hair. 

Which came off. Hux stared at the clump of straw blonde hair in his hand, unable to process it. A wig? A hideous blonde wig. Matt’s real hair poured dark and lush around his face.

“I…uh…Don’t like my hair,” Matt said, half frozen with one hand palming the outline of Hux’s dick through his underclothes and no shirt on and a hard-on pressing into Hux’s thigh. Hux’s brain gave up.

“Sure,” he shook his head blankly and the wig was gone and he divested Matt of his own undershorts. Hux didn’t focus on much beyond that point. This was an indulgence, wasn’t it? Why not fully treat it that way? With a careful swat he removed Matt’s hand from his crotch and tore the remaining cloth off. Hux went to his knees and ignored the look on Matt’s face and began mouthing the lean man’s cock before taking it between his lips. Matt’s fingers twisted into Hux’s hair and the pull felt so good. A low hum of approval traveled through Matt’s abdomen; Hux would’ve smirked if his lips hadn’t been stretched out. The general pulled back only briefly to spit into his own hand before he resumed the task of bobbing on Matt’s dick. 

With his spit-slicked hand Hux touched himself, paying no regard to how degrading he would have found this in any other circumstance. His other hand had come to clutch at the back of Matt’s thigh. The muscle there was firm as well and Hux glanced up at the face of the other man. The lips were parted and the eyes were screwed shut and Matt the radar technician was well built under that jumpsuit, wasn’t he? The sight sent Hux’s mind rolling—it would be best to continue like this and suck him off. They were in his office after all, it wasn’t as if he had any lubricant laying around. Hux paused to readjust himself—his knees were not overly pleased with the position—and when he did he felt Matt’s hands on his shoulders and suddenly Hux was being pulled to his feet. 

Matt gripped Hux’s hips, his hand coming between the two men to grab at both of their members at the same time. The friction was a bit more than was pleasurable and Hux spit again, brushing Matt’s hand out of the way to take over. Matt’s mouth landed on his neck and began to suck a dark slick spot into creation under Hux’s ear. 

“Fuck, General,” Matt groaned as Hux redirected his attention to the head of Matt’s cock. Hux felt a pair of hands kneading into the flesh of his backside, drawing a noise from the back of his throat. Matt thrust into the general’s hand, rubbing against his dick and both men fell relatively silent as the task at hand clouded their other thoughts. Matt reached his peak first, grabbing at Hux’s ass and digging his fingers into the muscles hard enough to feel like it would bruise. One hand left his ass and came around to finish Hux off, using his own cum to slicken the movements. Hux came with a strangled noise, burying his forehead against Matt’s shoulder, letting his own arms go slack as Matt all but milked him out. 

They stood like that for a few moments, panting and holding each other while Hux worked up the will to look at the mess they had made. He’d have to take care of it himself—the idea of the sanitation crew finding any evidence of this made his skin crawl. 

“Well then,” Hux cleared his throat and pulled away finally, immediately missing the heat of the other body on his skin. 

“That’s quite the secret to keep from Kylo Ren of all people,” Matt breathed out, already regaining his awkward brand of composure. Hux sighed and bent over to pick up the damn wig. “How many other secrets do we intend on keeping from him?” This time his tone was clearly playful. “Because I certainly wouldn’t mind,” Well. Glad to see he enjoyed himself, Hux thought without lying. 

“Stop bringing him up,” Hux snapped. He had been more than willing to remain in the nice, vaguely uncomfortable afterglow that came after decent sex; he didn’t want it ruined with thoughts of that man. But it was gone and it wouldn’t come back so Hux offered Matt his wig back. “And the answer is none. Unfortunately,” he added, not unkindly. “Your transfer is scheduled for tomorrow afternoon which should give you enough time to get what affairs you do have in order,” 

“What?” Matt had not taken his wig back. Instead he was staring at Hux as if he were braindead. Hux decided to take that as a compliment.

“Your transfer, back to the cafeteria staff,” 

“I…you…do. Do you really not know who I am?” Matt looked truly bewildered now. “I thought we were doing a thing,” his voice grew quieter and quieter and as it did so his brow furrowed deeper and deeper. “Like this was some sort of fantasy,”

Hux snorted. Sure. A fantasy, of sorts. “What? Would you have preferred I acted as if I were Kylo Ren or something? You certainly seem obsessed with him,” there was a beat of silence that could have cut steel. “Did you want me to call YOU Ren?” the idea was so absurd that Hux allowed himself a chuckle.

“I can’t tell if you’re joking,” Matt’s voice had passed through bewildered straight to needling panic.

“What a man desires in bed is his own business,” Hux held out the wig, serious again. “Although to be frank I probably wouldn’t have wanted to play along with calling you Ren,” When Matt didn’t reach for it Hux threw it back down to the ground. “You look better without it, by the way. The same can be said for the glasses,” he began redressing himself with tight, clinical movements. Matt was staring at him, jumpsuit still around his ankles, wig on the ground looking as if some sort of cruel joke was being played on him. 

“You don’t know who I am,” Matt said blankly.

“You’re Matt. Formerly a cafeteria worker, quite possibly the shittiest radar technician to ever breathe and currently a statue cluttering up my office, with an obvious preoccupation with Kylo Ren,” Hux replied. “Should I know anything else?” he fixed him with a firm gaze which Matt ignored, clearly hung up with this revelation. Finally Matt shook his head slowly. 

“No. Um. No,” 

“Good. I trust you know that speaking of this to anyone would not end well for you,” 

Matt nodded distractedly. Hux turned away slightly, allowing Matt a modicum of privacy to redress himself. It occurred to him that the other man was moving slowly. Shell shocked, Hux thought, and that same little stab of pity ran through him. 

“Matt, it was…look, if you were staying here, then maybe we could…again. But, uh,” he clapped the other man awkwardly on his bare shoulder, “You’ll do fine so long as you stick to the cafeteria,” he tried to sound as supportive as possible, but he really just wanted Matt to get dressed and get out. Matt nodded agreeably, if dimly, and finished zipping up his jumpsuit. 

Once Matt had finally left his office, Hux let himself fall back into his chair. His headache was gone, at least. And the minor indulgence was enough to last him a long while, so that was nice. He opened his eyes to see a new message waiting for him. The name attached to it blinked on the screen. It had to be a coincidence. 

Hux opened the message from Kylo Ren and felt something inside of him lurch.  
“Do you really not know who Matt is?” it was short and clipped and repeated itself in a loop. Ren looked as if he had dressed himself in a frenzy, belt undone, cowl hanging low on his chest. This was getting out of hand. Hux slammed a palm on the reply key. 

“No. It is becoming increasingly clear to me that I DO NOT know who Matt the fucking radar technician is. If you would care to enlighten me, please feel free to. Otherwise, I would prefer it if I never heard his name again and this subject were dropped permanently!” he barked. He shouldn’t have sent the reply, but it was gone into the network before he could think to recall it. He’s probably someone’s son, Hux determined. Kylo Ren did not send a reply. And after waiting for a minute or two Hux stood, straightened himself, and set about cleaning up his office. 

He considered the matter with Matt resolved, as he never saw him around the base again. Right up until he had barged into the discussion Kylo Ren was having with the Supreme Leader and saw the man without his mask on. Hux’s mind had raced and the two men did not speak of the matter. Right up until Kylo Ren had shown up outside of Hux’s personal quarters, silent and looming. Hux regarded him coolly, fully prepared for whatever it was Ren had to say.

Hux’s own questions about the situation were pushed to the back of his head. His curiosity about what Kylo would come up with was stronger.  
“General,” Kylo began, taking a step forward into Hux’s personal space. “I have it on good authority that you have been keeping secrets from me,”


End file.
